Sex is one thing, a complicated thing, but nonetheless an issue as old as the ages ...as old as the sexes. Just ask Adam and Eve. Sex is the basis of a lot of pain and sorrow, ‘love’ notwithstanding, and it’s also the basis of a lot of good-natured humor, ‘marriage’ not withstanding.
Rape, however, is another thing. It’s a crime. Sexual Assault. And like sex, it’s as old as the ages as well. But there is nothing funny about it and it has nothing to do with love. Men have been abusing, violating women in this way forever. It’s universal, and it’s something that won’t go away. It is inherent into the male species, and we seem to have learned to live with it. Not accept it, but live with it, like any crime.
Actually, we have accepted it, to a certain degree. Because there is absolutely nothing we can do about it. It happens and it will continue to happen. Why? Because it is a systemic anomaly widespread throughout society. Legally, there are no consequences until it happens. When it happens, it’s too late to prevent it. To prevent it would take either a cultural change through education programs toward sexual violence, good luck with that ...or initiating harsh punishment for perpetrators, like castration. But, of course, we are to civilized to initiate such cruel and permanent punishment. We’d rather accept rape as a common occurrence and let the politicos deal with it through rhetoric and good intentions while their hearts and prayers go out to the victims and their families.
Men have ‘affairs‘ ...women have affairs. There's a wide range of reasons, ‘sex‘ being the most prominent. Sometimes people are hurt, marriages are ruined, families are broken. Sad. However, sometimes, people are liberated, marriages become stronger, new families are formed. Deliverance. Sex is a volatile drug. It’s fickle. Power and politics seem to have a significant bearing on promiscuous sexual activity as well, and however objectionable this may sound, all of these fall into the ‘normal’ range of ...‘sex’.
Rape crosses the line.
President Donald Trump has recently been accused of rape. E. Jean Carroll is a columnist in New York City. She has ‘come out‘ and accused Trump of raping her in a woman’s dressing room in the Bergdorf Goodman department store on 5th Avenue in the mid 1990’s. Carroll’s story seems plausible. As plausible as Christine Blasey Ford’s accusations of violent sexual assault against Brett Kavanaugh who was subsequently confirmed to a lifelong position as a Supreme Court Justice. Promoted by Trump.
Carroll says she won’t press charges. The statute of limitations have run out. But she still has the dress she wore that day she claims she was raped by Trump in that dressing room at Bergdorf Goodman. The minute-by-minute details of her story are as compelling as they are frightening and disgusting. Trump, of course, says it never happened, that he doesn’t know her and never met her ...although photographs say differently.
New York City Mayor, Bill de Blasio, has offered to open the case and have the dress assessed for Trump’s DNA in the same way Bill Clinton’s DNA was detected on Monica Lewinsky’s infamous ‘blue dress’.
Trump claims that he could shoot someone on 5th Ave. and not lose any voters. Well, lets’s see if he can rape someone (allegedly) on 5th Ave. and not lose any voters. My money is on the women voters, all voters, with a sense of pride and dignity.
Trump’s track record with women speaks for itself. And then, of course, there is the infamous 2005 ‘Access Hollywood’ bus tape which also speaks for itself, and for Donald Trump. If you don’t know about this tape or you haven’t seen or heard it you shouldn’t be allowed to vote. Google it, it’s very disturbing as well as enlightening.
Multiple women have accused Donald Trump of sexual improprieties ranging from touching to kissing to groping, and now to rape. He has denied them all, except for the courted and paid sexual improprieties with porn stars, Playboy models, beauty queens and other assorted female professionals that have all become widely publicized, and all while he was a married man ...and who knows while he is President of the United States ...and the ones we don’t know about. See a pattern here? Tip of the iceberg?
Should it matter ...a person’s private sexual life and preferences? Is it anyone’s business but the parties involved? Yes and no. Yes, if you have a conscience and integrity, and a sense of responsibility to the people who love you and depend on you. No, if you don’t care about anyone but yourself and If you are a narcissistic womanizing predator who thinks he can get away with anything. Sound like someone we know?
All’s fair in love and war, but the politics of rape is a different matter. Sometimes the truth can be found in the sex, lies and videotape, but most of the time it’s he said, she said.
As for sex ...it’s complicated.
John Kushma is a communication consultant and lives in Logan, Utah.
